Page 1 of 16 12311 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 153
  1. #1
    Farmer At Work Farmer1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Location
    Yes i do
    Posts
    5,307
    Rep Power
    248

    Raffle for a Buzz Vivid stick ST 4000 01/18/2021 - bigstar

    Sorry about the mishap all I can do is restart the raffle

    We will be raffling a Buzz vidstick ST4000
    Thanks to bwcbob for all your generosity and great support to our wonderful community!
    Please if you need anything get a hold of bwcbob by PM, his prices are great and and is awesome to deal with.

    Raffle will be open to all members and staff

    Rules are simple 1 guess every 6 HR
    Winner will receive a ST4000 VidStick

    bwcbob is awesome at posting jokes so I have decided to pick one of his joke posts

    What I need is the joke I have chosen

    Last time we did this I enjoyed reading a lot of the jokes

    Good lock and have fun


    Click the link shown below and that will open the 'Joke' forum area
    http://iptvtalk.net/forumdisplay.php?37-Jokes
    Last edited by crazed 9.6; 01-18-2021 at 09:16 PM.
    Two of the greatest qualities
    to have in live are:

    PATIENCE
    and
    WISDOM

  2. #2
    Nascar Pool Diecast Winner
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Location
    yes i do
    Posts
    371
    Rep Power
    37
    Three Knots.....

    Dan, an old retired sailor, puts on his old uniform and heads for the
    docks once more, for old times sake.

    He engages a prostitute and takes her up to a room.

    He's soon going at it as well as he can for a guy his age, but needing some reassurance, he asks, 'How am I doing?'

    The prostitute replies, 'Well Norman, old sailor, you're doing about three knots.' 'Three knots?' he asks. ' What's that supposed to mean?'

    She says, 'You're knot hard, you're knot in, and you're knot getting your money back.'
    Last edited by crazed 9.6; 01-18-2021 at 09:16 PM.

  3. #3
    Farmer At Work Farmer1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Location
    Yes i do
    Posts
    5,307
    Rep Power
    248
    It would be greatly appreciated if you would copy and past the joke Please
    Two of the greatest qualities
    to have in live are:

    PATIENCE
    and
    WISDOM

  4. #4
    Nascar Pool Diecast Winner
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Location
    yes i do
    Posts
    370
    Rep Power
    23
    The Preacher and the Peanuts.....

    A preacher visits an elderly woman from his congregation.

    As he sits on the couch, he notices a large bowl of peanuts on the coffee table.

    "Mind if I have a few?" he asks.

    "No, not at all!" the woman replied.

    They chat for an hour and, as the preacher stands to leave, he realizes that instead of eating just a few peanuts, he emptied most of the bowl.

    "I'm terribly sorry for eating all your peanuts. I really just meant to eat a few."

    "Oh, that's all right," the woman says. "Ever since I lost my teeth, all I can do is suck the chocolate off them."

  5. #5
    Guru
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Posts
    256
    Rep Power
    19
    Nothing personal....


    "I hope you didn't take it personally, Reverend,"

    an embarrassed woman said after a church service, "when my husband walked out during your sermon."

    "I did find it rather disconcerting," the preacher replied.

    "It's not a reflection on you," insisted the church goer.

    "Ralph has been been walking in his sleep since childhood."

  6. #6
    Bulletproof
    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    857
    Rep Power
    97
    A priest and a Doctor Golfing - posted 6/14/2018. Bob will have you in stitches with his jokes. Good luck everyone and thanks to Bob and Farmer for making this happen.. andkaal

  7. #7
    3 Time Nascar Pool Winner 4me2c's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Location
    Out There...!
    Posts
    6,751
    Rep Power
    300

    Oh My....

    The marriage between the elderly farmer and his young wife was not working out too well, so the farmer consulted his doctor for advice.

    "The next time you're down in the field plowing and feel a yearning for your wife don't wait until lunch time or the end of the day, but quit what you're doing and go to the house," said the doctor.

    "I tried that," said the farmer, "But by the time I get to the house, I am so tuckered out, it's no use."

    The doctor thought for a minute, "Take your shotgun with you when you leave the house in the morning and if you feel the urge, shoot the gun and she will come down there where you are."

    A few weeks later the two men met on the street.

    "How did it work out?" asked the doctor.

    "Fine, the first three days," said the farmer,
    "But then hunting season opened and I haven't seen her since."


    Thanks to bwcbob for the Gift, Farmer1 for the Chance and IPTV for being here so it All is Possible...!!! Good Luck Everyone, Let's have some Fun Again...!!
    Last edited by 4me2c; 01-18-2021 at 11:48 PM.
    WWJD...!!!

  8. #8
    Diplomatic Emissary zaang83's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2019
    Location
    yes i do
    Posts
    780
    Rep Power
    70
    As they stopped at a ....

    As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goats milk was used.

    She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing.

    "These", she explained, "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce."

    She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?"

    A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours."

  9. #9
    Chief Officer
    Join Date
    Nov 2014
    Posts
    651
    Rep Power
    55
    A little old lady was walking

    A little old lady was walking down the street dragging two large plastic garbage bags behind her. One of the bags was ripped and every once in a while a $20 fell out onto the sidewalk.
    Noticing this, a policeman stopped her, and said, "Ma'am, there are $20 bills falling out of that bag."

    Oh really? Darn it!" said the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can find them. Thanks for telling me officer."
    "Well, now, not so fast," said the cop. "Where did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?"
    "Oh, no, no", said the old lady. "You see, my back yard is right next to the football stadium parking lot. On game days, a lot of fans come and pee through a knot hole in the fence, right into my flower garden. It used to really tick me off. Kills the flowers, you know. Then I thought, why not make the best of it? So, now, on game days, I stand behind the fence by the knot hole, real quiet, with my hedge clippers.Every time some guy sticks his thing through my fence, I surprise him, grab hold of it and say, 'O.K., buddy! Give me $20, or off it comes.'"
    "Well, that seems only fair," said the cop, laughing. "OK. Good luck! Oh, by the way, what's in the other bag?"
    "Well, you know", said the little old lady, "not everybody pays."

  10. #10
    Bullwhale
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Location
    yes i do
    Posts
    741
    Rep Power
    82
    Getting Revenge With Marriage

    Old Farmer Johnson was dying.

    The family was standing around his bed.

    With a low voice he sad to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones."

    Wife: "No, I can't marry anyone after you."

    Johnson: "But I want you to."

    Wife: "But why?"

    Johnson: "Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!"

    Thanks Bob and Farmer1

 

 
Page 1 of 16 12311 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •