Give him a job

A young man with pants hanging half off his ass, two gold front teeth, and a half-inch thick gold chain around his neck walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check.

He marched up to the counter and said, "Hi. You know, I just HATE being on welfare. I'd really rather have a job. I don't like taking advantage of the system, getting something for nothing."

The social worker behind the counter thought for a moment and said: "Your timing is excellent. We just received a job opening from a very wealthy old man. He wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. As part of your job you'll have to drive around in his 2018 Mercedes-Benz CL and he'll supply your clothes."

The social worker went on to say: "The hours may be long, so meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say, but also as part of your job you must satisfy her sexual urges. She's in her mid-20's and apparently she has a rather strong sex drive."

The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said: "You're bullshittin' me!"

The social worker said: "Yeah, well... You started it." .....